Music Commiseration
by Novelist-In-Training
Summary: Jasper remembers some of his human life.


_**Music Commiseration**_

**-Disclaimer- I don't own the characters or the music.**  


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Bach's Cello Prelude echoed throughout the lofty clear room reverberating against the glass walls as the sun began to set in the distance barely obscured by high tree tops. The house was lonely, he thought. Not a sound or whisper just the cello playing solemnly from the speakers and the sound of his faux breathing.

He had never learned how to play the instrument that he so loved. It just felt too complicated too intimate and he never did like those feelings. Never, not since his sister Mary Beth went quiet when he was seven sitting dumbly at the window playing and plucking at the strings in her fit of disenrollment from the world.

He shut his eyes imagining the symphonies, the operas he'd seen in his long life and how his mouth watered at the way the cellist fingers danced and the concentration laced in his face and emotion. Unadulterated love for the music the swoon that he could never in his life emulate in anything.

Sure he was a southern boy at heart but he'd loved these things had a passion of art and music. Sissy stuff, his father called it and Jasper had to agree then because this was his father. But the little he remembered of his human existence, the times with Mary Beth and her fiancé Edward Bellamont would play their instruments for the children.

When he and his younger brother Arthur would sit by the hearth and watch as Edward played effortlessly at the Violin with a smile gracing his handsome face. Mary Beth with her cello swaying with the music she created with him. It was fascinating beautiful and lulling. Oftentimes Arthur would fall asleep listening to them play but Jasper would keep his eyes opened watching them hearing them.

It was a shame when Edward contracted tuberculosis and died it really was.

Mary Beth had not been the same after and until he'd left to war she'd been sitting at the window of her house playing dully the same tune; Bach's Cello Prelude Suite #5 in C minor. It was probably the first song she'd learned though Jasper couldn't really recall since he'd been so young and sometimes he wondered about the cello. Did they keep it? Destroy it after she died?

But the _violin _was safe in the Stanley's attic tucked into a large oak case. An item passed down the family apparently though Jasper wasn't sure how that had been possible at all.

Sometimes when no one was around he would play the violin. He would crawl into the attic late at night with nary a sound and, as though cradling a child, he would run off with it into the night to the clearing and play.

And this was done alone.

Sometimes he played popular songs and sometimes he would play Edward's song. The eerie tune from his childhood; he would see him standing in the clearing a tall lean figure with hair turned copper from the sun shimmering in pale moonlight, broad shoulders strong hands and long tanned fingers. His thick brows furrowed in concentration the same color of his hair and his brown eyes mere slits hardly opened. His long legs would be inches apart as he played and he would sway with his song with a smile in his lips.

He had been a master with the bow in his hands much more then the rich Southern boy he'd lived as since he was thirteen and though his step father periodically reminded him of his newer surroundings Edward was a Frenchman at heart. A lover of all things wonderfully delicate and beautiful and enriching and how Mary Beth had loved it all too.

They were planning to go to France after they married. They were going to be actors in plays and musicians, vagabonds and penniless but happy. They were going to see the 'old world' and see the Botticelli paintings. There was so much that they wanted to do that they never did. Edward had died at thirty barely after the wedding and Mary Beth became a widow at seventeen.

The injustices of the flawed and weak human body, Jasper thought, how incredibly _diseased_...

The music ended. There was a click and then the lights in the bedroom turned on. It didn't take his inhuman skills to tell him that Edward was home and getting ready for the long night alone. After all, since Bella had left him choosing human life rather then sick eternity Edward had kept to staying home at night.

"It's always this night of the year old man." Edward said changing the CD. "Is it your birthday or something?"

"No," Jasper said. "truth be told I wasn't aware I did this on this particular night of the year."

"Doesn't matter after all I find myself going to the clearing the same day of each month. I guess to remember her and the beginning of that relationship." Edward shrugged. "I suppose it keeps me sane."

"I suppose." Jasper said with a sigh. He could feel raw emotion the longing. Edward wanted to see her tonight wanted to hold her just once more but Bella had been adamant about their break up.

_'I can't be associated with any of you,'_ she had said. _'if I allow myself to be friends then I'll be tempted to be like you again and that isn't what I want at all. I'm sorry.'_

It was cold how she'd turned her back on Edward and had addressed the family but they weren't hurt by it. They had known it was a possibility that she would leave him and them. It was smart of her to do it the way she had. If she had stayed with Edward after making her choice she would have resented him. If she had become one of them she would have resented them all. Rosalie had felt happy with the decision of course. It had always been about protecting Bella's humanity to Rosalie. She had understood much more that no matter their young appearance, that Bella was just a child in comparison to the family. It would have been wrong..

"Are you going to the wedding?" Jasper asked.

"Of course I am. I was invited by the groom it is a chance for me to see her once more before she leaves Charlie's house and even better, to see her in wedding garb." He smiled. "And I did so want to see her that way. I want to see her smile, that I know she is making the right choice."

"That is very noble of you."

"It is, though something inside of me is screaming to kill the mutt."

"I can feel it."

"Indeed you can." He frowned. "Mike Newton talked to me today, told me that I was now an honorary member of the 'Broken Hearts Club' which has quite a following."

They laughed.

"Edward, do you remember anything from your childhood?"

"Nothing except my parents faces." Edward said. "Why?"

"S'nothin'. Jus thinking about my sister is all. I remember a little bit about my family mostly dealing with her. My brother's this fuzzy image looks like me only he's got brown hair I recon my eyes too but I can't be sure." He shrugged. "Makes me think that the reason I am the way I am is because of Mary Beth and Edward."

"Me?" Edward asked.

"No my sister's husband Edward. He was into all this stuff and I guess he rubbed off on me. He was this real charismatic man always smiling and playing music. He loved my sister a hell of a lot enough to deal with my old man and taught Arthur and I a few games and taught us how to be around people to." Jasper nodded.

"And the violin you like to play in the clearing I assume was his."

"That's correct." Jasper said.

And there were no more words between them as the moon rose and hung high in the distance. There were no stars and gray clouds sprinkled across the black balmy sky like smoke puffs. The time for talking was finished for tonight, Jasper thought. It was time for Edward's silent commiseration, at least until the sky gave way to dawn.

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**Might add on might not. No flames only reviews.**

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